And then God laughed

I have never really been much of a planner. The idea of organization ( which I have changed in that area- now I NEED organization in my life a little bit, well at least inside my house) had always been something that brought on more frustration than it solved. I was always the fly by the seat of your pants kind of gal. Things worked out, things didn't-what ever. I was young. (still am shooooooot) So I started to get to a point where it was no longer living like a "free spirit"-it was becoming kind of irresponsible ( in my own eyes at least) to always be just going with the flow. I picked a random degree out of thin air to go to college for. I mean, I have always been a creative person so I thought I could put it to use. I also wanted to get into marketing somehow, so I thought design and production would be cool. So i went with it. The idea of having a plan freaked me out. It means I could fail. Or, I could succeed and have to then try to do something with myself after I get this degree-which I could also fail at.

I ignored that (not really) and then suddenly began making all kinds of plan. We ( Jen and I ) were going to  finish our degrees and move to California. We were going to get the most adorable apartment near downtown Huntington Beach, or somewhere amazing. We would work together, or close by. Our apartment would be ADORABLE and we would make TONS of friends and we would work our way up the chain  to eventually be the head of our own marketing company. I would handle the creative teams, she would handle the $$ and employees and stuff like that. I would be perfect, we would do everything together. We would own a boat, be invited to the VIP parties, go home flying first class and rent expensive rentals and bring home expensive gifts. And although we partied in high school we showed them. Eventually we might meet Mr.Right after dating and breaking the hearts of all the not-good-enoughs. Maybe get married and maybe have kids.

Then God laughed. 

Jen moved away.

I met Mr. More-than-I-ever-knew-I-always-needed. Got hitched. Got knocked up n popped out the most amazing kid.( Seriously you guys he blows mouth farts on my arms mid nursing session and then cracks up @ 6 months old)

She lives in Arizona in an apartment overlooking a lake. We see each other once a year and talk once a week.

Living without a plan, you don't aspire to achieve anything. You live in the moment which is fun but also can easily turn self-destructive. 


I have realized lately that although God laughs at our plans because His plan is THE plan, it is still important to at least have goals, and hopes and things to keep you moving to reach your potential. We just need to make sure we are in prayer and in the word to make sure that we have the discernment to know whether the goal/plan/aspirations we are daydreaming about are His and not our own selfish ideas for selfish desires. 

So now, I sort of organize. I have hopes and aspirations and goals. Small ones. acheiveable ones that will keep me growing. 

Do i look back and wish I had everything I used to want, ( well sometimes when I am having a woe is me day) No...(haha) 

I know I am so much more happy than I would have been. Although I do miss my bestie.

Emily Alyssa Rachel & Aniela are a few amazing women I have been blessed with in my life. We love talking and sharing and I know that they have some lessons in their life that would be great to learn from. Because I learn something new about life just about every time they open their mouths